Feb 292012
Feb 272012
Feb 262012
> GENCOLAMD: Steal CARD GUY’s cards.
Unfortunately, only certain classes can use THIEVERY on ITEMS that are EQUIPPED. Apparently the game designers thought that STEALING isn’t SCIENTIFIC enough for a BIOMANCER to do!
Although, now that you think about it, you could probably BIOMANCE up some sort of HIDEOUS ABOMINATION UNTO GOD that is the perfect THIEF. You begin to DRAW UP PLANS for such a beast!
> DPP: Ignore INGNEZ, PRINCE OF ACORNS and attack CARD GUY with something you prepared earlier.
You use your SHOULDER MOUNTED SIGHT-LINKED AUTOTRACKING PLASMA CANNON to SHOOT the PLAYING CARDS GUY. INGNEZ, PRINCE OF ACORNS uses his INTERCEPT ability and DEFLECTS the blast with his ACORN SHIELD. INGNEZ is DESTROYED, and the CARD GAMES GUY takes one SPILLOVER DAMAGE from the PLASMA CANNON.
On his turn, CARD GAMES GUY plays ARIA, MAIDEN OF THE SACRED GROVE! Her SPECIAL ABILITY allows her to CHARGE one additional SACRED ENERGY per turn. He also places one MAJYICS CARD in the QUICK MAJYICS ZONE and ends his TURN.
> AJ: Contact me if you need help with the TCG character- I should have sufficient experience from my history with the Yugioh and Pokemon TCGs to give it the skills you need.
The AUTOCRATIC JUSTICAR just laughs. He knows how to extract INFORMATION from people. Oh, yes, he knows.
In fact, just for that display of INSOLENCE, he decides to take away all the CANDY. All of it.
> DPP: Shoot the QUICK MAJYICS ZONE to detonate the trap card in CARD GUY’s face!
Feb 242012
Feb 222012
> GENCOLAMD: Biomance the REGULAR GUY into something useless!
Please. You are a MAN OF SCIENCE, and as a man of SCIENCE you know it is completely impossible to TRANSMOGRIFY a creature without a TRANSMOGRIFIER. Or MAGIC, you suppose, but as a MAN OF SCIENCE you are not allowed to ever admit that MAGIC exists or might in any way be valid!
> DPP: Go find an enemy that you can use your mechanomantic powers on. Like a TRANSFORMINATOR or something.
Yeah! If you see one of those you’ll be sure to MECHANOMANCE the heck out of him!
Meanwhile, your OPPONENT has made his move. He has inserted his GENERIC CARD GAME DECK into the slot in his CARD THINGY and drawn a FULL HAND of CARDS. He uses his first turn to GENERATE the mighty INGNEZ, PRINCE OF ACORNS! A MONSTER can’t FORAY on the TIME INCRIMENT that it was GENERATED, so he ENDS his TIME INCRIMENT, leaving the INITIATIVE to you!
Feb 212012
Feb 202012
> GENCOLAMD: Run away!
According to your CALCULATIONS, two on one is DISADVENTAGEOUS. You run toward DOOMPUTTPUTT’s position. The REGULAR GUY gives chase while the TRANSFORMINATOR just stands there.
> DPP: Decide to use the VESTIGIAL LEGS as your preferred weapons from here on out.
You see GENCOLAMD running toward you with an ENEMY PLAYER in pursuit. Now’s a chance to use your NEW ULTRA-POWERFUL WEAPON. You strike with the VESTIGIAL LEGS!
Absolutely nothing happens. You thought for a moment that they were NON-SHITTY LEGS, but you guess they are just normal SHITTY LEGS after all.
> GENCOLAMD: Biomance the REGULAR GUY into something useless!
Feb 202012
> GENCOLAMD: Get tired of this crap and go in through the front door.
ACCORDING TO YOUR CALCULATIONS, the harass/time spent ratio is, at this rate, unacceptably low. This calls for a more direct approach.
You BIOMANCE up a MEDIUM-GIANT OCTOPUS and give him a STRENGTH BIOINFUSION you concocted on the way up. He easily wrenches the door open.
On the other side you find TWO of the OPPONENT PLAYERS. One of them looks like JUST A REGULAR GUY, so it’s hard to tell his CLASS, but the other is obviously a TRANSFORMINATOR. Between the CHESTPLATE THAT IS ACTUALLY ANOTHER HEAD, SECOND SETS OF HANDS ATTACHED AT THE WRIST, WHEELS WHERE HUMANS DON’T USUALLY HAVE WHEELS, and the CRANE ARM poking up from behind his shoulders, the class is pretty UNMISTAKABLE.
> DPP: Rip off the VESTIGIAL LEGS and smash through the wall with them!
You RIP OFF your VESTIGIAL LEGS, but unfortunately FLESH has HARDNESS that is two low to punch through metal! This action is pretty much completely pointless.
To your surprise, the VESTIGIAL LEGS manage to COMPLETELY DEMOLISH the wall. You ENTER the MECHANOFORTRESS.
Feb 192012
Feb 182012
